Poll: You get thrown in jail for 10 years over a fight that isn’t your fault. What are you going to do?
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The Justice System is Screwed Up!
#1
A suspicious looking man moves into your neighborhood, next door. He stands 6 foot 5 (just like this man) and he weighs 290lbs, built like Brock Lesnar from 2002!

6 Foot 5 Man

Brock Lesnar 2002

He's a Human Resources manager, making six figures, who used to be a police officer near you. Everyday he gets up for work, wearing a suit and tie, driving his red, 2021 corvette stingray, ZR1. Unfortunately, this man absolutely despises you because you're in a relationship with his ex-wife, who dumped him because he cheated on her. She looks like her:

Hot Girl

Your girlfriend, who is his ex-wife, doesn't want that man because he cheated on her and now he's trying to get her back. The problem is that he's persistent and won't leave her alone, even though you told him to back off, multiple times. Before you even think about resorting to physical actions, he's twice your size and he's at least 7 inches taller than you.

He also has a background in professional boxing and holds a black belt in ju jitsu. You on the other hand, can't fight at all, holding zero skills! This man continues to press you because he knows he has power over you, and considers himself to be physically superior to you.

Fast forward, you come home from your job as a CEO of a tech company, catching your girlfriend flirting with her ex-husband by his car, next door to you.

Woman Flirting with man

Your emotions run through the roof, you're so irritated that you make the wrong move, yelling at this dude, popping him square in the jaw! Also, you're in love with your girlfriend.

A few people see that a fight is about to breakout, which means that the whole neighborhood gathers around (with their phones), recording the action. You're about to get embarrassed, badly because for one... he has a hard chin. Two, he's way more physically dominant than you are, so you don't stand a chance.

The fight breaks out, and let's just say that when it was over, you got some broken ribs, a busted nose, a busted lip, and a black eye.

Person beat up!

Then his girlfriend moves all her stuff in with him because she thinks that he's way more manly than you are.

To sum everything up: you got your ass kicked, you lost the girl, got embarrassed in front of everyone, and now you're trying to figure out what to do. Sure, you could press charges. However, that guy is friends with the police department, everyone in that neighborhood, and the judge.

Bad Guy Shaking Hands

Fast forward again, you decide to take this to court, anyway. Unfortunately, the jury decides that your guilty. The guy's lawyer makes up a lie, saying that he has a medical history and can be explosive if he's pressed the wrong way. Judge makes a decision to have you thrown in jail for 10 years, for one little fight??!

Oh and btw, you lost your job because for one, everyone thinks you're setting a bad example for them as CEO. Two, you're in jail, now.

Person in Jail

That's not fair! What are you going to do?
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#2
For one, you have the court system completely wrong to begin with (at least in the United States). If I press criminal charges, the jury cannot find “me” (in this case, the prosecution (i.e., the state)) guilty. All a jury decides is if the defendant is guilty or not (which is the other dude). If this is a civil case, the jury does not decide guilt. They rule in favor for one side or the other, and the penalty is never going to be going to prison (you also have that wrong, you do not get put in jail for the length of ten years as a punishment). The penalty for losing a civil case is monetary and/or an injunction.

Two, where the hell do you come up with these threads?
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#3
(19th April 2022, 4:00 PM)Uptight 534 Wrote: For one, you have the court system completely wrong to begin with (at least in the United States). If I press criminal charges, the jury cannot find “me” (in this case, the prosecution (i.e., the state)) guilty. All a jury decides is if the defendant is guilty or not (which is the other dude). If this is a civil case, the jury does not decide guilt. They rule in favor for one side or the other, and the penalty is never going to be going to prison (you also have that wrong, you do not get put in jail for the length of ten years as a punishment). The penalty for losing a civil case is monetary and/or an injunction.

Two, where the hell do you come up with these threads?

This is a situation where no one is on your side, no matter what. The plaintiff has a good reputation with everyone, unfortunately. You may argue that you're not going to get put in jail for the length of ten years as a punishment, but you have to look at it as no one in that court room is on your side, no matter what.

This is also a situation where, if you argue that statement in court, everyone will be biased towards the plaintiff. So really, you're fighting a losing battle.
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#4
You couldn't even take this guy to court man... Well, you could, but you would instantly lose. From what you said, there is video evidence of you punching first. That makes his response technically self-defense. This has nothing to do with the justice system.
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#5
First thing I'd do is realize that the security guard of the prison that I'm stationed in was formerly in my college bowling league with me. His name is Edward, and I once picked up a spare on the last frame to win us a grand prize of $1000 each! Edward looks like Evander Holyfield from 1997, but not missing part of his ear. He convinces the warden to transfer me to a minimum security cell, which is where we team up to make my escape. He remembers that time I got him that cold hard $1000 cash, and wants to repay the favor.

So Edward, he knows the ins and outs of this prison. He's been working here for the past 11 years, after all! He tells me there's a secret way out through the paneling in the ceiling. All I have to do is remove the panel in the southwest positioning of my cell, climb up there, and crawl my way to a 2 way intersection. He hands me a walkie talkie so he can guide me through the branching paths. First I take a left, then another left, then a right. He says it'll lead me to a crawl space with a small window that I can push open.

After I push open the window and scale down the wall, I sneak my way past the lookout guards. They don't notice me, as they're distracted by another inmate trying to escape. It was an extreme stroke of luck! So I took full advantage and scaled the fence when no one was looking. I'm actually getting away with it! The alarms are going off, but they think it's for the other inmate trying to escape! I run straight into the woods as fast I can and don't look back. I've made it back into civilization again! Now to get my revenge.

First off, this orange jumpsuit has got to go. It will draw too much suspicion. Luckily, Edward's shift just ended. We have a conversation over the walkie talkie, and I describe my surroundings. He brings me a change of clothes. I change out of the orange jumpsuit. Edward tells me that he's got my back, and will help me exact revenge. He calls up his buddy Frank, who looks like Dolph Lundgren from 1985. Both Edward and Frank are skilled MMA fighters and have never lost a match in their respective leagues.

After Edward and Frank are allied with me, I find out that Frank just so happens to be a large scale lawyer! He makes 7 figures a year and drives a 2022 Bugatti Chiron SS. He finds that they used a loophole during the lawsuit, and has a way of making sure that nothing happens to me. One that would completely eradicate his bogus claims. Even though Edward and Frank both have muscles, it's seeming like we may not even need them. Brains over brawns! Turns out that Edward does private investigating as his hobby! He finds out a way for me to win back my girlfriend. Now's my chance to get my life back!

He finds out that she really likes diamond earrings, and men that wear luxury sunglasses. It sounds kind of strange, but I trust Frank. After all, me and Edward have been friends for 22 years. I trust anyone that he's friends with. Being a CEO with vast wealth, I decide to buy the diamond earrings and luxury sunglasses. Frank also tells me he'll score us a huge cash settlement against her ex-husband. I can't win my girlfriend back yet, though. First we have to deal with her ex-husband.

Due to Edward's private investigating hobby, we find out his phone number and location. Frank calls him and tells him that he's a large scale lawyer, and that his court case will get dismissed. In a panic, the ex-husband gets flustered and promptly hangs up. We track down where he is. Surprisingly, he's not with my girlfriend. He's at his vacation home, all by himself. We leave him be, for now. If he's not with my girlfriend, then I can go win her back. If the ex-husband isn't at her place, then she must be alone too.

It's Saturday afternoon now, and my girlfriend is taking a day of leisure. Frank generously loans me his 2022 Bugatti Chiron SS. Turns out that she also likes sports cars! I roar the engine of the Bugatti outside of her window. I wait about 45 seconds, then see her step outside. She looks outside and sees me looking suave as hell, rocking my luxury sunglasses and borrowed sports car. I can instantly tell that she is impressed, so I park my car and approach her. As I get ready to hand her the diamond earrings, I remember something my father gave me in his will after he passed.

"Mystery, I want you to have this wedding ring. It pains me to say this, but I planned on divorcing your mother and marrying another woman. I couldn't go through with it. I was overcome with guilt. They wouldn't do a return on the wedding wing. Now I want you to have it. When you meet the woman of your dreams, then I want you to propose with this ring. It is my final request of you." Well it just so happened that I was carrying it in the back pocket of my dress pants, so I plan to propose to her after I give her the diamond earrings.

I take off my sunglasses and put them on my blazer. "Here, I want you to have these diamond earrings." She looks on in awe. "Wait, that's not all. There's more to this. Ever since I met you, I knew I had to spend the rest of my life with you. We complete each other. While I can't offer you the burly muscles of your ex, I make up for it in personality, poise, and suaveness. Deep down, we both know that we're right for each other. So with that in mind", as I get down on one knee, "Will you marry me?" "Oh my gosh, yes! Yes, Mystery!"

So all is well, right? But what of the ex-husband? Won't he find out about me getting back together and marrying his ex-wife? Well, as it turns out, after that phone call from Frank, he was overcome with negative emotions. Hearing that his lawsuit would be thrown out wasn't the only bad news he received that day. He also got a phone call from the CEO, letting him go from his HR position. After losing his job and having his case thrown out, he took his own life. So that's the end, that is how I met your mother.
Zack means everything to me 💛
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#6
@Mystery Bro, have you ever thought about being an Author, writing you're own book... Or maybe a writer for a movie script or something? That was really interesting to read.
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#7
(20th April 2022, 11:32 AM)Different Wrote: @Mystery Bro, have you ever thought about being an Author, writing you're own book... Or maybe a writer for a movie script or something? That was really interesting to read.

Thanks! Glad you liked it haha. I have considered writing my own book, and have even tried in the past. Problem I have is making it a full length. And honestly, this thread gave me a lot to work with.
Zack means everything to me 💛
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#8
(20th April 2022, 11:49 AM)Mystery Wrote: Thanks! Glad you liked it haha. I have considered writing my own book, and have even tried in the past. Problem I have is making it a full length. And honestly, this thread gave me a lot to work with.

You just need to collect all your thoughts and practice writing them down on pieces of paper. Even though on average, it takes months to write a book... you have a great story and we know who the characters are, so it's just a matter of time and dedication on your end.

On the flip side, I will be doing more threads like this, every week or so. They'll just improve over time, as I read the comments. I learned a lot from your story, though.
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#9
Mystery and Different, you guys make some of the craziest and interesting scenarios/stories. Big Grin

I don't think punching someone in the face is even 5 years in prison, it'd probably be more so 3-6 months but it is what it is. I'm in prison. I'd go the much less exciting and much less risky route of waiting out the 5 years and read a bunch of books. I'm in prison, I have no responsibilities, why not learn a new skill? It's like going to university but self-taught. I can get my parents to bring in some textbooks and I can start learning some bomb-ass algorithms theory.

No responsibilities, free food, get to go outside for 1 hour a day? It's like university except I paid to go to university! I'm sounding like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D04wb7P_v-4 lol
--
I just realized it's 10 years, not 5. But I can plea for an early release on good behavior.

Also, to hell with my "girlfriend" or "wife", whatever the story is. I'll go find someone else, or hell, just play games at the bars and call it a life. Work a factory job and go fishing on the weekends. Easy life.
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