DISCIPLINE! 😫😰🔥⚠️

[*Izi-Blissers*]

@*Izi-Blissers* I'm curious to know what you think of disciplining children, since you have a child and you've also taught children as well 🤔

As a parent, I have never resorted to physically hurting my children or the children in my care due to their 'bad' behaviour. Some children are harder to deal with due to their history, their mental health, physical attributes etc.
If an adult needs to resort to physical harm on a defenseless child then that adult has failed to safguard the child and fulfil their duty too protect and raise.

There is one thing I can say with confidence, as a child myself who was mentally and physically abused, my behaviour was due to underlying problems. I became afraid of my parents, I was scared to tell teachers, I was scared to ask for anything. You don't make children fear you, the moment they show signs of fear, a parent has failed. I ran away from home, I self harmed, became suicidal because of my childhood. You can't put a child through that just because you as a grown adult couldn't keep your hands to yourself

A relationship with a child should be solely based on love, trust, and honesty. You break that then you shouldn't be allowed near children. Yes we all get angry and frustrated at children who choose to cause chaos, yes children don't listen but at the same time as adults, don't we do the exact same? If we are allowed to show our feelings without anybody making us feel a certain way then why do we shut children down for doing the same?

Children are odd beings, they show their feelings in so many different ways! If a child is acting up and you feel the need to smack them to stop them, just think for a second. How would you feel in a situation where you were frustrated so you slammed a door and started screaming and someone came up to you and started to smack you, screamed at you to shut up, called you horrible names and dragged you into your bed and shut the door?
It isn't nice is it. Then why do some people do it to children?
Because it's a power trip! An adult who feels they are superiror to a child are just pure scum of the earth. These little humans have spent mere 5 minutes on this planet and we expect so much from them and when they don't get it right we punish them. No! This is wrong!

The strategies I use with my children, my foster child, and the children I used to work with inside the school were:
-Give the child space and time to evaluate the situation and calm down.
-Approach the child when they seem calmer and help them identify the problem/cause of their behaviour.
-Use punishment where applicable such as time out, no electronics, groundings, calling home, parent meeting, family meeting, no pocket money etc.
-Approach when you are also calm and collective of your own emotions and thoughts; there is no point talking when both parties are still worked up and highly likely to clash again.
-Apologise. There is nothing more powerful than an adult who says sorry to a child when they have been in th wrong.

Now say we are talking about children who are showing psychopathic behaviour, children who show interest in hurting others or themselves, what do we do then? In this case I would agree with using physical force to stop the child, not hit them but to use force to stop them during episodes. These children don't belong with the general public in a school, nor do they belong in a house where vulnerable children also reside. This is the case where the only help you can give the child is seeking support from police and mental health team. Too many children are neglected mentally and they become horrible adults because nobody taught them any better, nobody helped them.

As adults it is our job to look after all children around us, whether you see a child receiving a slap/punch in public, stand up for that kid! Too much abuse is normalised and these innocent beings are dying by the hands of their carers. There's enough on the news about kids dying, the system letting them down, if it takes you as an adult to report and help a child suffering, then you have done good for that little life.
Adults need to do better!