Let's get this thread to a million pages!

[Mia]

So I got some help at the library's reference desk.

[Mia]

But I kept hearing these really loud crunching noises coming from way over on the other side.

[Mia]

That's when I decided to hit the streets again, and what did I see?

[Mia]

It was my good friend Jack, so I slapped him five.

[Mia]

That's when I went into an antique store looking for a faberge egg.

[Mia]

So I went to the man running the stand and said hey (bum bum bum) got any eggs?

[Mia]

As it turned out, they didn't have any eggs. That wasn't very eggcellent.

[Mia]

Then I remembered, oh crap! I am late for my shift at UPS!

[Mia]

I hopped in my truck to make my first UPS delivery, but I heard a gunshot!!! I freaked out!

[Mia]

That's when I decided, this job isn't worth getting shot at, so I quit.

[Mia]

I decided right then and there, that I would start my career as a singer.

[Mia]

The problem was, I wasn't any good. I managed to get a gig at a local theater.

[Mia]

But I was terrified of ghosts and hecklers. That's when I heard "BOO!" and "YOU SUCK!"

[Mia]

Just my luck, the two things I was terrified of just happened to be in the same theater.

[Mia]

That's when I decided to go to Arby's and complain about the food.

[Mia]

I didn't go there to eat anything, I just wanted Arby's to know that their food was bad.

[Mia]

Then I went to Olive Garden, and I was outraged at their menu!

[Mia]

There weren't any olives on their menu anywhere!!! What a ripoff!

[Mia]

So I turned into a Karen and complained to to the boss.

[Mia]

But the boss was actually the final boss from Ghost 'n Goblins.